This should be love

I turned on my rusty, 8-year-old Toshiba netbook with a heavy heart. I routinely uninstalled and reinstalled the audio driver, a thing I do every single time I log in. I discovered quite some time ago that that is the only way for the audio to work.

I know I wanted to listen to 'One Last Time' by Ariana Grande. 

Some days are better and some days you hear that your ex is coming to town again.

How long has it been, I couldn't keep track of it anymore. How many times I've cried, I couldn't keep track of it anymore. But I know this has been a brutal process.

I want to talk to him like the night I saw him before he left. I want to tell him what I have in mind for my future. I want him to hold my hands while he shares his advice and encouragement. 

So it goes, my longing for him.

Except he wrote to me a few days ago, 'I've never moved on and never will. No day goes by without thinking of you'.

Maybe the stars will align again one night.